Randy Wray’s Blog

Even with all my education, training and experience I come across moments of doubt, moments of great faith angst. It’s not about losing faith or walking away from God. Though, there are times those insidious suggestions must be strangled and dragged forcibly to the cross of Jesus to surrender.

Like you, I am not immune to the struggles of faith. Becoming a Bible-major may have exempted me from taking calculus and chemistry but it has not exempted from crisis and chaos. It’s about having more questions than answers. It’s about hearing more questions from others than answers you have to give.

You’ve done nothing but accept a job. Your supervisor has as their life’s goal to make your life a living hell.

You’ve done nothing but bring a child into the world. You wonder at the irony that the hospital you are in and out of has a revolving door.

You’ve done nothing but given your heart to someone. You discover down the road that one you loved, one you trusted decided not to keep sacred promises.

You wake up again in an empty house. You work at a place that drains rather than fills. You watch in despair on the sideline of your children’s choices. Your at odds with him. You can’t remember the last time you had a civil conversation with her.

What you need is acceptance, understanding, the knowledge that someone cares about you and your struggle.

I’m tired of cliches and “feel-good” mantras disguised as spirituality. The best words I feel we can offer to those who struggle, to those who hurt are few. “I’m sorry” sounds a lot better to me than “don’t worry God causes all things to work together for good.”

There are times when we don’t need to hear about what God will or will not do. There are times when we need to experience the presence of God. This may come through the words of a friend (or stranger). The presence of God may come through the presence of a friend, someone you trust.

Last night was such an experience for me. A few of us gathered around a coffee table and planned a new small group. We talked and listened and struggled together through the experiences of one. We prayed together and I know, without a doubt, we were in the presence of God.

There are people who insist that ministry is about the clothes you wear, it‚Äôs about the image you project, it‚Äôs about the form you adhere to for a certain amount of prescribed minutes. That‚Äôs church. And it‚Äôs probably why fewer and fewer people go to church. What we experienced was the presence of God. And if church were more about experiencing the presence of God we would be different people. We’d be adequately equipped to face the challenges of this fallen world.