Can we talk? Is it even possible to hear those words and not think of Joan Rivers?
When someone begins a conversation with the words “can we talk” you know it will not be good. ‚ÄúCan we talk‚Äù is usually the prelude for gossip or bad news. No one who starts a conversation by saying ‚Äúcan we talk‚Äù finishes by saying ‚Äúso that‚Äôs why I‚Äôve decided to give you the lake house.‚Äù
Larry Crabb contends that the shallow relationships we experience with God and with others – even the key people in our lives – relates to our shallow talk. Here is an excerpt from his book Soul Talk: The Language God Longs For Us To Speak.
Every day — in the bedroom and the boardroom, on golf carts and jumbo jets, in coffee shops and small group meetings — people are talking. People chat, argue, gossip, flatter, maneuver, preach, strategize, and tell wonderful stories. But too often it’s only talk — and seldom the kind of meaningful conversations for which we were created. Hollow talk isolates us from our children, our spouses, our coworkers, and fellow believers. We are largely unknown, undiscovered, unmoved, and untouched, because our talk rarely reaches the soul.
I included this book in my pile of reading for this year based on the recommendation of a former interim youth minister. In addition to her recommendation, what peaked my curiosity was the premise of this book which states: When our talk does reach the soul we will know God more intimately and relate to others more deeply. Learning this new language will ignite spiritual passion, allow us to experience lasting joy, restore broken relationships and enable emotional healing.
Sounds like a language worth learning and something worth talking about.
10 Responses to “114113855437680966”
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February 28th, 2006 at 10:24 am
A reporter asked me the other day how teachers get students to actually listen to them. I told him that it wouldn’t happen without some sort of a relationship. There has to be some depth to the talk.
Can’t wait to hear more about the read.
February 28th, 2006 at 10:40 am
Sounds like you’ve read some of Bill Glasser’s material on Quality Schools. According to “Mr. Bill,” “quality” will not occur on the part of students unless there is a relationship between students and teachers.
I guess that would involve some conversation beyond the subject material.
All you have to do is mention hkvedd and ears will perk up.
February 28th, 2006 at 11:08 am
We are in too much of a hurry and too self absorbed to really care about what anyone else has to say. But we do want them to hear our shallow talk!
I’ve always gained greatly from Larry Crabb’s books and will pick up a copy of this one. Can’t wait for all the meaningful conversation we’re going to have at Pepperdine!!
February 28th, 2006 at 11:14 am
Sooouulll Taaalllkk….
a Don Cornelius Production.
The cover of that book is bad, bro.
Next Mr. Crabb might write a book about listening. Conversations tend to be more meaningful when it is applied. Trying to listen to God might not hurt too much either.
February 28th, 2006 at 11:24 am
That relationship and listening thing……….good stuff. I “became a Christian” at age 13 but was way past grown before I understood there was a relationship to be had with God.
February 28th, 2006 at 11:46 am
P.S. - Randy, I miss the song “We Are the Body of Christ” not coming on at the opening of ACOC’s website. Where did it go?
February 28th, 2006 at 12:14 pm
Ouch, the excerpt chosen by the web site didn’t seem to capture what you described.
He writes about “internal realities” such as excitement, fear, pressure, anger, happiness, boredom, emptiness, misery, compassion and so forth and then says these are not life. As long as we’re on this side of the curse, aren’t these part of “life” as we know it in a broken world?
Sure, as Christians we know a glimpse of the life that can/will be, and I suspect (hope?) that’s where he’s going in this book. Any love and joy we experience here on earth is also only a glimpse of real life with God. But also, real life here on earth includes sorrow, shame, misery, happiness, emptiness, peace, etc. That is our reality and to share those with one another brings us closer to God as well as one another, just as Jesus shared with us in suffering, pain, sorrow, joy, companionship, etc. It seems to me, not to share all of these with one another and with God is not to experience the realities of life on earth and distorts our understanding of what ‚Äúreal life‚Äù will be with God for eternity.
His observations in that excerpt struck me as shallow as the “talk” he is critiquing. Those are very broad generalizations. I hope he parses those out in the remainder of the book, although I‚Äôm not enticed to buy it yet. Tell me it gets better.
February 28th, 2006 at 12:15 pm
Judy: After they brought in the praise band, they had could not longer use that song!
March 1st, 2006 at 2:11 am
I read the book about a year ago. It talks more about listening to the other and listening to “the Spirit” than talking, to answer one of the comments to your blog.
It deals basically with what keeps us from communicating with folks in an unselfish way. Though I found the end of the book too “vague” for me, it was a worthwhile read and will be read again.
March 1st, 2006 at 9:16 am
thanks for the feedback on the book. I’ll listen.