Preaching IV (Get The Ball Y’all, Get The Ball)

Posted by: Randy in Blog Thoughts Add comments

(I’m pleased to welcome a new addition to my blog buddies.  Check out the coloring book when you get a chance.)

In the fall of 1983 (has it really been that long?) I was off to Abilene Christian University to begin my academic pursuits.  Beth laughs about the time she went to ACU to visit her brother and check out the possibility of enrollment.  Coming from California she was struck by the dress and hairdos of the gals and was highly amused by the chant at the football game "get the ball y’all, get the ball."  There’s more to the chant but it’s hard to type in drawl.

Being six hours from my nearest source of income it was obvious that I should, along with most other college students, look for a job.  My first job was a great job.  I had cousins that attended the Church of Christ in Robert Lee, Texas.  It so happened they were looking for an interim preacher.  I’m pretty sure I dusted off my Three Crosses sermon and drove the 58 files to try out.

The church leadership liked what they heard, or at least they liked the minimal time they had to hear and I was hired to be the interim preacher until such a time as they could locate and hire a full-time preacher.

So, with rare exception, I drove every weekend to Robert Lee Texas and preached a sermon that I received the week before from my dad.  It was a sweet deal in many respects.  I would stay with my cousins, get to do laundry, eat great food, preach twice on Sunday AND get paid.  Not to shabby for a college freshman.

With the help of my dad’s sermons, and at the time I saw no problem whatsoever preaching through his outlines, my time crept up and I was in the 15 to 20 minute range.  The ol’ bait and switch - get the job with a ten minute sermon and then give them an extra 5 to 10!  After all, I was being paid and wore suit and a tie and everything.

A few weeks into my tenure as the interim preacher a man on the front row, who to this point had been asleep, woke up suddenly with a tremendous roar like yawn.  Smacked his lips a couple of times, blinked his eyes a time or two and went back to sleep.  Like a deer caught in the headlights I froze, mid-sentence, in my tracks.  I was surprised, shocked and a little bit scared.  Did he just die right in the middle of point # 2?  It was no window incident but had I just killed a man with the power of my oratory?

Investigator - what do we have here?

Me - it was an accident, I swear.

Investigator - are you not in freshman bible?  thou shalt not swear.

Me - he’s just asleep

Investigator - this man is not asleep, he’s dead

Me - dead?

Investigator - yes, he is dead and it appears he died of boredom! 

I looked into the audience for help and everyone was looking at me.  There were a few head nods and those hand signals you make when you’re trying to tell the preacher, "go on, finish the sermon."  I wrapped up the sermon quickly so as not to kill a second person and wouldn’t you know it the moment we began to sing that invitation song he woke up for good this time.

Afterwards I inquired as to this event, because no one else seemed particularly concerned about it.  They told me, "oh, that?  Well brother so and so has a heart condition and does that every once in a while."  I remember thinking "that would have been useful information to share with the new interim preacher."

My time in Robert Lee was a tremendous blessing and a great learning laboratory.  Having to preach two sermons a Sunday (even with a borrowed sermon) gave me the first taste of the tremendous burden of study and adequate preparation required for the job.  It was during this time that I began to write my own sermons based on the things I was learning and studying in class. 

Speaking of class, I was in the school band at the time and preached one Sunday night in a tux because we had a concert at school and I wouldn’t have time to make it back and change.  I wish I could remember the sermon I preached in the tux.

The church members were very gracious and tolerating of my efforts and witnessed first hand my growth and development as a speaker.  My cousins put up with an invasion every weekend and being young I’m sure I did not adequately convey my gratitude.  My roommate and other friends would often go with me for the weekend.  I’d often take someone with me to lead singing and others would even have opportunities to teach a class or participate publicly in the assembly.  It gave Robert Lee their very own college age group.  They would feed us and dot on us like we were part of their church family.

I worked with this church for the better part of a year and smile at the memory of Robert Lee, Texas.  I was sad when they finally hired a full-time preacher.  Someone who would live in the community and work on a daily basis with the church community.  A part of me hopes they were a bit sad as well.

6 Responses to “Preaching IV (Get The Ball Y’all, Get The Ball)”

  1. Stoogelover Says:

    Good memories! Love the interrogation part. I suppose all of us preacher-types have a story of that first church that tolerated us. God surely must smile down on churches such as the one in Robert Lee, TX for their part in growing up preachers.

  2. cwinwc Says:

    Maybe the sleeping / heart attack brother had confidence in your preaching abilities? We have a brother at church who tends to sleep through most sermons. His matra is that he has full confidence in our preacher preaching only the truth.

    Hey, maybe some of my students have the same confidence in my abilities as a Math teacher?

  3. l.marie.d Says:

    my father in law is narcoleptic (he takes medication) so that was his excuse for sleeping through the sermon. so i ask my husband what his excuse is when he starts to lean forward and softly snore? ‘just trying to be like my dad.’ when i remind him his dad has a medical condition, he just shrugs.

    sounds like a brilliant way to start university… so, has your dad published a book of outlines for budding young speakers?

  4. Meowmix Says:

    Too funny! I laughed out loud at the image of you frozen in mid-sentence!

  5. Brady Says:

    You were one blessed dude.

    I went through 4 years of ACU and did not preach but once, and that was in the preaching class. It lasted 10 minutes, was the best sermon I’d preached up till then, and they paid me a “B”.

  6. thurman8er Says:

    I remember telling a HIlarious story during one of my sermons at the little church in Firebaugh. An elderly gentleman near the front smiled broadly and made me very pleased with myself. Then I realized that his false teeth were falling out and he was just adjusting them.

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