I know (at least I think I know) why we give automatic answers to certain questions.
The question "How are you?" receives an automatic response of "Fine".
The question "How are things?" receives an automatic response of "Good".
The question "Do these jeans make me look fat?" receives an automatic slap because we didn’t answer fast enough.
Recently someone asked me the question "Are you happy?" and without hesitation I said "Yes."
It was an automatic response I gave without even thinking. Had I taken the time to think about it I could have probably come up with several reasons not to be happy.
I was glad for the automatic response. Part of being happy is dwelling upon good things and not dwelling upon the other stuff.
In relationships of confidence we must reach the point where we can move beyond the automatic responses and be completely honest with each other.
This is healthy and helpful. It not only helps us process it allows us the chance to share in the joys and sorrows of others.
In case you’re wondering the moment you recognize the question being formed, by the time the word jeans enters the sentence, you should be prepared to swiftly and decisively say NO and immediately quote something from Little Women or Pride and Prejudice.
It’s the most important automatic response.
